And the worst thing is: we were never warned when we were young! Was it so that we could grow up in relative peace of mind that the world is fair and just and frankly not irritating.
Here come the bullet point of just ten, I won't overload you. And it's not even the top ten things that annoy me.
- What's with the coffee shops? Starbucks, Costa, Prezzo's! We are a nation of tea drinkers that are investing in the image of a hip and up to date cappachino drinker. The coffee with the fancy name, with the three inch heads of aerated milk, cream or chemically modified slush colours confection. There is no small, medium or large, no you ask for a Grande, its not that Grand you have to say with an Italian accent and you then find out that the simple cup of coffee that you wanted? Well it just isn't!
- Coming back to the coffee shop generation, there's also the staff to consider. The sheer idiocy of teenagers or even adults these days. They can be very literal but only when you do not want them to be! You asked for green tea madam? Well here's your mint tea. OK so I suppose that we can be grateful that they got the colour right. Your 50% right deary is what I'd like to say, but I don't, I'm just ranting quietly in my head and developing a peptic ulcer but don't worry your pretty little overly bleached head about it!
- The whole P.C. thing gets me. You have to be polite and not call it like you see it. God forbid you should mention that someone is black, white or overweight. Even if they are. Then you're not being rude because it's the truth. How about this for an un-pc sentence: Hi I'm a Caucasian female of European descent, living in England and my skin is currently a tanned, dirty beigey pink colour. You might be a man or a woman, probably a bit overweight or also compulsively throwing up and thinner than a POW victim and your skin, statistical ywill be tinged yellow, chocolate brown or dirty pink. There stick that in your complaints letter and smoke it!
- Telemarketers
- Weathermen/people/whatever!
- Being put on hold while on the phone to customer services that cost over a pound a minute to people that wont speak proper English and are a couple of thousand miles away. Who will then ask you to wait a further hour or two while transferring you to 'a department that will handle your query'. Then you get timed out and you have to start all over again.
- School is the best days of your lives. Yes we were told that but nobody believed it! We thought yes! no more school. But they never warned you about mortgages, bills and that irritating blinking light on the dashboard of your car. You're sure it means something expensive but you put it of so you don't have to worry about it.
- Standing in ques! Look there's a till open just two ques down and you look at it, and debate about it but does anybody actually leave their appointed and self induced cattle drive? NO!
- Those ridiculous trousers/jeans/things that hang down at the crotch that you just want to walk up to and yank. Either resulting in the worlds harshest wedgie or showing the world that the boy's penis doesn't actually fill that space, no matter how much he wants to believe it.
- It comes from America. It's cheerful. It's totally fake and we just want you to leave us alone so shut up! 'Can I help you at all madam?' No I'm a perfectly capable adult with a working pair of both hands and eyes! and 'Have a nice day!' You don't mean it. After dealing with the people that can't be bothered to open their eyes, or don't realise that the fact that it's not there actually means...hmm let me think...it's not there! You are wishing that the customer would step under a bus, be sent to hell and have to answer stupid questions for all eternity. All with a saccharine expression on you face and a sing song good bye.
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